5 Ways She Speaks Was Nothing I Wanted

Hello sweet friends! I sure have missed you, although it certainly has been a welcome break of refocusing. I returned from She Speaks a few weeks ago to immediately repack and head for camping! You might remember this city girl was a bit nervous, but other than loads of mosquito bites it was tons of fun! Life has officially returned to normal with the start of school and my writing time being reclaimed!

I wanted to share a few things that impacted my life while at She Speaks. I went to North Carolina with definite expectations and came home with none of them being met…isn’t that the way God works! So here is my list of 5 ways the Lord gave what I didn’t know I wanted.

20150722_222328She Speaks Swag It Begins! Ministry Stone

1. A Lesson of Insecurity = Pride 

Yep, you read that right, those words had me on my face in repentance. On the first day of pre-conference, the workshop I was most excited for was on spiritual warfare by Whitney Capps. I was initially on the wait list for this but  I’d say God knew I needed it!  I have always struggled with insecurity. My name, my body, my calling, my ability as a mom, wife, photographer, christian. I could go on and on, I’ve doubted just about everything in my life. I’ve labeled myself mediocre at best, failure at worst. I NEVER considered this a source of pride. When this light was cast over insecurity I saw myself written all over it. I used my labels to replace God’s truth, I thought and worried about what others thought of me over what God wanted me to do. Hence why 2012-2014 on this blog is virtually non-existent. I knew I should write and share but, was too afraid.

Meeting Whitney Capps

Me with Whitney Capps, if you haven’t heard this firecracker preach the word of God you are missing out!

2. Given a Rhema word. 

The first main session of the conference started, tables for 800 women to sit were set up. As we wind our way through the isles and choose a seat we see little scrolls of paper. We were told that these papers contained verses that had been prayed over, selected and laid at each place setting. That winding through the tables and sitting where we did wasn’t by accident.

I received 1st Corinthians 15:58

Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain. 

A rhema word from God is a portion of scripture that speaks into your current life situation. For me I came to She Speaks with baggage of, am I on the right path. Is blogging my plan or the Lord’s? What is the next step? So for me to read stand firm, let nothing move you. Just wow! Then to read that when you work for the Lord it can’t be in vain. Talk about baggage being dealt with as I continue to mediate and process that!

3. Anointed with Christ’s Confidence

During the last workshop of the weekend there was a call to be anointed and prayed over. A room of more than a hundred women were anointed and sent out. Talk about powerful stuff. This room swelled with worship music being played on a single guitar and a single vocalist. I was the seventh shaky woman to stand in front of Wendy Blight, she placed the oil on my forehead and prayed over me. The only words from this prayer I grasped on to and refuse to let go of was to “go and be filled with Christ’s confidence.” He alone will be my confidence, when I look at that spot on my forehead or graze my finger over it I am flooded with thoughts of His confidence.

 

Meeting Wendy BlightHaving God breathed truth spoken to you

Me and Wendy Blight! The lovely lady taking this picture, who I had never met, asked me my name and said I was beautiful from the inside out. She gave me another rhema word from Song of Songs, You are altogether beautiful, my darling, beautiful in every way. 4:7 She said I was beautifully filled with the Lord, never have I felt instantly loved and given words like this.

4. I was called from birth

In an earlier workshop, the speaker encouraged the group to reflect back on the moment of your calling and in moments of discouragement remember that moment in order to have strength to go on. I pondered that thought for the entire workshop, spent some time in the prayer room pondering that thought afterwards, and after being anointed continued to ponder it. I thought well, maybe if I can’t remember a moment of being called, only having this overwhelming urge to make Jesus famous (that I’ve prayed to have removed) then perhaps I’m not truly called. As woman after woman went forward to be anointed and voices joined in with the vocalist to worship our Lord, I took a moment to ask my new friend sitting beside me this pondering question.

She responded with “have you considered the possibility that you were called from birth?” She went on to share that she has been told since she was little that she was called. Her mom during pregnancy felt she had a light growing within her that would shine bright. She knew her baby before birth, had favor with the Lord so, she named her Anne-Renee . This struck a memory that has been coming to mind for months. This moment of childhood, I was 5 or 6 jumping on my bed singing. I remember bouncing and singing, likely off key, that God was good, greater than satan and Jesus would always win. At this point in my young life I had been to church only a handful of times, yet I knew truth, I was called to truth. Truth, that I now believe was put inside of me before breathing my first breath.

New Godly Friends

Anne-Renee of The Masterpiece MomFunny story, her and Amanda (the other half of The Masterpiece Mom) happened to be some of the first girls we met upon arriving Wednesday night, all they said was they were from Alaska and I already knew their blog! It can be a small world here in the blogging sphere.

5. There is intention to being named Winter.

This might sound a little weird to you, why would the Lord address your name, you maybe thinking. For me though, growing up very shy and having the name Winter drawing attention to me, I hated it. HATED it! As an adult I’ve learned to tolerate it. Because what other choice is there. It was minimal tolerance though, since nearly every time I introduce myself to someone I receive an “oh, that’s different” (with a puzzled look on their face).

While at She Speaks people already seemed to know me and remember me (there was a private Facebook group for getting to know each other) which I found shocking, all because of my name. Well, ok also partly because of my current very red hair color! In having a conversation about this with my new friend from Costa Rica, she encouraged me to search the meaning of my name and allow God to reveal Himself through my name. As she is saying this, an amazing dawning poured down over me. The day I was born was the middle of October (the 23rd in case you are wondering when to send the gift! Just Kidding!!) This ordinary day in October that I was to be born on and to be named Kelly Nicole, it snowed. Snowed and made it feel like winter, prompting my grandpa to suggest the name Winter Nicole. Frankly, I had always scoffed at that reasoning. But this idea that the God of all the universe sent snow, in order to have His message received by a non-Jesus believing man all so I could have the name Winter stopped me in my tracks.

I looked up the meaning of my name by the way….Winter Nicole means bringing renewal / victorious people. God blows me away.

Friends Speak Jesus Truth2 from Costa Rica + 3 from Indiana = Forever Friends

This lady spoke pure Jesus truth to me the entire weekend! I was beyond blessed to meet her and can’t wait to visit Costa Rica one of these days! The 5 of us made the best of friends!

 

Why do I write all of these terribly personal, reflective thoughts? Because through these five occurrences, the Lord revealed my true calling and passion. I was called to boldly become like Jesus. To be boldly confident in who I am in Christ. I am passionate about allowing God to work in me, making me more like Christ as well as seeing others embrace and boldly become who God has called them to be. Just in case you had any remaining thoughts that I have it all together or some such nonsense, the above should take care of that. I am nothing without the presence and grace of the Lord.  But I am confident in moving forward in who I am, who you are, and encouraging both of us to be bold, all in the name of Christ.

You can usually find me on these amazingly awesome blogs! 

 

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Comments

  1. Winter, you are such an inspiration to me and you have been for quite some time. I only hope to have the relationship with Christ that you have. I’m just starting this journey and I’m enjoying reading your blog. I’ve gone to church off and on my whole life but for the last year I’ve just had this urgency to become more and be a better person. Thank you for being you.

  2. Thank you for posting this on Facebook! I loved reading how God spoke to you as well! 🙂 God bless!!

  3. Hey Winter. Sounds like the conference is really awesome. The Lord really met you there. Sometimes those words of assurance are like a life vest to cling to when the storms of doubt come. I like what you share about remembering the moment you were called. There are a couple of moments I think about at times. It does help to know that God does have a purpose for us from the start. God bless!

    • winterlawson says:

      It was tremendous! You are so right, I plan to start a file to go to on the days I question it all! It will hold notes from others and snippets I will write to myself, to lift me up once the waves of doubt come. Have a blessed week!

  4. Your take-away is worth a million conferences! I am so glad to have been able to share in this with you. I love your heart, I love how passionate you are…and how sensitive your heart responds to the truth that God has for you. I love laughing, crying, and worshiping with you. Just love being your friend! Glad you are back at the keyboard!! 🙂

  5. 1 Cor 15:58 has been of special significance to me for some time, and I love how God keeps reminding me of that verse in unexpected ways. Most recently, as part of this morning’s sermon, tonight’s Bible study, and now in your blog! First time here visiting your lovely blog and linking up — hope you’ll stop by Saved by Grace for a visit!
    God bless,
    Laurie

  6. Wow friend. I am so honored to be a part of this post and a part of your She Speaks experience! God is clearly at work. Can’t wait to see what He has in store for you! “For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord…” May your eyes continue to be open to His Word and your ears attentive to His call. Love you, sweet sister! Sending tons of hugs from Alaska!!! ~ Anne-Renee (The Masterpiece Mom)

    • winterlawson says:

      I am so very blessed to get to call you friend! Thankful beyond thankful that God had it planned out for us to meet!!

  7. Enjoyed your post, Winter! It’s great that you found out the meaning of your name. I definitely believe that God gives us our names for His specific purpose and plan. I recently blogged about our God-given names. You can check it out on my blog. Thanks!

  8. Winter – You were definitely missed while you were away! But I am so glad you had both a great retreat and a restful vacation with your family. I love all the things you shared about your experience and am so glad God gave you what you weren’t knowing you needed. I am also so excited that someone talked to you about your beautiful name and shared that God named you! and what a powerful meaning your name has. I too hated – HATED my name for every until about 9 years ago, when someone talked to me about the same thing and God began to show me why He chose that name for me. God is pretty awesome that way. Welcome back and thanks for sharing and hosting 🙂

    • winterlawson says:

      Awww, it is so nice to be missed! What’s funny is I truly didn’t know it needed addressed, but God did! I love that God revealed the purpose of your name, so cool!

  9. I wish they’d come visit Asia soon. I would love to attend events like this.
    You are one blessed gal to have experienced it.

    First time to link here. Glad I’ve found you. 🙂

    Happy new week ahead!

  10. I had some of the same revelations–pride, calling, God’s intentionality in our lives. I wish we could have met at She Speaks! Maybe 2016? 😉

  11. Hey Winter,

    Thanks for sharing your story about She Speaks today. It sounds like it was an amazing weekend for you. So glad you got to go and be a part of it all!

    And, thank you for encouraging others as you do. I have enjoyed your link up parties and your post for several months now. God is using you~

    I hope you will have a blessed day today,
    Melanie

  12. Beautiful. I agree, I had never thought of insecurities as pride. Also, when I first saw your name, I thought it was quite lovely! #MommyMomentsMonday

  13. Winter, what a great experience you had! I’m hoping to travel for next year, since I live in Puerto Rico. Love your pictures and what you’ve learned about it! Thanks for sharing with us and encouraging us at Words of Comfort Link Up! See you next Monday!

    Hugs,
    Tayrina

    • winterlawson says:

      Start saving those pennies and if it’s the Lords will He truly will make a way for you to be there! I hope you are able to make the journey, I have been to several conferences in my life but there was something super special about this one!

  14. Winter, so glad I spotted your post at #WordsofComfort! Not just to hear about your time at She Speaks, which sounded amazing, but also because you hit on some of the same insecurities I’ve nurtured in my own short time blogging… God has used your thoughts and words to motivate and inspire me today 🙂 Thank you, thank you!!! Lord bless!

    • winterlawson says:

      I am so very glad He was able to speak to you! The enemy likes when we are insecure and feeling timid, we do the work for him then. We sisters have to boldly hold each other up!!

  15. When I recently joined your lovely link-up, I thought to myself, “Wow! I like the name Winter! What a unique name!” 🙂

    Thank you so much for sharing all that the Lord spoke to you and taught you during the She Speaks Conference. He always does above and beyond what we hope or expect!

    I was greatly encouraged in visiting you today. 🙂

    • winterlawson says:

      He certainly does, I think He enjoys it a bit when we have expectations because He is able to respond with a “Oh, let me show you how little you had imagined with your expectations!”

  16. I loved reading every word of this Winter! But I got chills reading that your baggage was lifted. Amen–God is so good!
    I didn’t make it this year, but maybe I will see you next year.
    Blessings,

  17. Thank you so much for your words about the She Speaks conference. I’m so glad God was able to work in your life. I’ve enjoyed reading your blog. I found it through Purposeful Faith. Thanks also for hosting a link up party.

  18. I am so jealous that you got to go to She Speaks! God didn’t have that in mind for me this year, so I’m looking hopefully toward next year. I’m so glad you got so much out of it! Blessings. 🙂

    • winterlawson says:

      If it is His will for you to be there next year you certainly will be!! It was an amazing and I hope you will be able to go!

  19. Winter, I love your name and I love your open, honest, transparent sharing of your heart here. I always wanted to go to She Speaks but never have followed through…now, because of what you have shared I feel led by the Lord to pursue it…I wish I didn’t have to wait a year…do you know of other opportunities sooner? Many blessings to you ❤️

    • winterlawson says:

      Thank you, you are too sweet! I hate that it is only once a year but I don’t know of any other conference like this out there. It will be worth the wait, I promise! If I have the chance to go next year I hope I get to meet you!!

  20. Winter, what a beautiful tribute to how God met you there. I found you at #Reflect and didn’t know you were here until now 🙂 I was drawn to your post because I toyed with the idea of going to SheSpeaks this year, but eventually knew it was not God’s timing. I’m living vicariously through your precious recounting now. Looking forward to getting to know you better through your words!

    • winterlawson says:

      It was a tremendous experience! I hope you will be able to go in the future 🙂 I’m so glad you came by this week and hope to get to know you better as well!

  21. Hey Winter!

    First of all… beautiful name and the story of it made me cry. Actually, I loved the whole post and I look forward to reading more of your words. Thanks for hosting a place to grow friends with the link up, but mostly for sharing the beauty of your experience. It made me wish I had gone to the conference. 🙂

    Many Blessings,
    Dawn

  22. God so often uses these events in ways beyond our imagination. We go expecting one thing yet we’re blessed in other ways. How wonderful an opportunity for you!

  23. Sounds like a great time of refreshment and learning! So glad you had that opportunity. Thanks for linking up at #ThreeWordWednesday.

  24. Winter, Once again I am blessed and touched by your words.(And wishing I could sit down and chat with you!) God is doing a great ministry to just the right people through you! You are a treasure!
    Blessings and smiles,
    Lori

  25. Sounds like you had a very moving and meaningful time!

  26. Owning our insecurities as pride–that’s a huge insight. I appreciate you sharing what you learned. You are beautiful, Winter! I’m glad you were humble enough to receive the anointing of Christ’s confidence. May we all be so.

  27. Thanks for sharing that – I know it was your rhemas, your blessings, but they are based on truth and God spoke to my heart too as I read your thoughts. It is good to write such a reflective thoughts after a ‘mountain top experience’ – there will come days where you will start to question, start to think based on old habits – book mark this post and keep coming back to what God has said – as you do that you will overcome your old habits and build new – this time based on God’s love and truth.

    • winterlawson says:

      You are so right, this will be one of my roots for the days when the wind blows hard! Thank you for stopping by you have blessed me with your kind words!

  28. Hello, neighbor! I enjoyed your post. Yes, I am nothing without God’s grace either. But with God’s grace I am going to be all God created me to be. Thanks for sharing. Blessings to you!

  29. I love your rock! I wish I could post a pic of mine but it’s exactly the same. 🙂 I learned so much about myself at She Speaks and so much want to bottle it up and distribute it here at home and in my church!

  30. appreciate the inspiration.

  31. Two things stand out in your post:

    1) the rhema verse for you is surely also a great verse for all of us who write. “Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.”

    2) the way God has been working in your life since you were born, calling you, preparing you, even naming you. Inspiring!

    your neighbor at Barbie’s

  32. Glad you could refocus and refresh!

  33. Wow Winter, I loved reading your, I was going to say story, but it is a testimony! What an awesome release and validation wtih and from God. Absolutely beautiful.

  34. Winter, what a wonderful, beautiful and powerful experience. I love how God encountered you and brought you confirmation through the words of others. Thank you for sharing at Weekend Whispers. P.S. LOVE your blog name!

  35. Oh what a sweet experience! Thanks for sharing at Women With Intention Wednesdays! 🙂

  36. Hi Winter!

    Firstly, I love your name (my daughter’s name is Autumn Joy!) and your red hair!

    What you shared about our insecurity being rooted in pride really resonated with me. I wrestled with this too, and actually took a two year break from my blog as well. But God is sooooo goof and I’m so glad to see what he’s done in your life. And your blessing /anointing was beautiful too.

    Blessings,
    Tiffiney
    WelcomeHomeMinistry.com

  37. Go in God’s confidence and make Jesus famous! Many blessings to you! liz

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