Jumping On, Finding Focus

Do you remember when you were a kid and raced to the merry-go-round at recess? That was my favorite recess past time. Running as fast as my little legs would go, dirt kicking up behind me, sweaty hands griping the rails and then…….

J U M P!

Jumping onto the platform to ride surfer style. As I rode until it came to a slow stop, my eyes continued to spin. I knew I needed to step down and find my balance so I could start again. I would continue this until a rut was worn into the ground from all of my running.

 

Isn’t this how we can live our lives?

 

We are running hard after a goal, we jump on to ride just a bit and the next thing we know the world is spinning and it seems impossible to see the path we need to continue on. It is easy to get stuck running around and around and then jumping back on. That’s where I’ve found myself, running, digging myself into a rut and losing focus.

 

Losing focus on my calling.

Losing focus on my dream.

Losing focus on what God says is for now.

 

Look to him | Me, Coffee & Jesus

 

The rut starts innocent until it gets harder to jump out of and up onto the platform. My platform that is for the now is my family, bible study both personal and with friends, and my little blog. We see our now as a rut, God sees our now as practice and obedience. I see running and jumping as tiresome and unnecessary, God sees it as endurance and being faithful to what he has given me.

 

I have been unfaithful and disobedient because I viewed life as a rut instead of the beauty that God has blessed me with. I have been impatient and less than nurturing with my kids. I have been absent from more days of bible study than I care to admit to you (but God knows :/ ) I have been intentionally silent here on the blog and all of my social media.

 

I must break the lie of: “life is a rut” that I’ve allowed myself to believe. I have to trust the growth process. I have to trust that God has made it clear to me more than once (more than twice) in the last 4 years that my focus and job is raising children and studying his word. It is so so easy to think I’m ready to jump and miss the step of tying your shoe only to fall flat on your face. I talked last in my vlog post about applying for a ministry position, sure I was going to get it only to be told no. While no is hard and a little part of me is still pouting about it, I know that God kept me from tripping over my shoelaces and has lessons for me to learn before that jump!

He keeps from tripping | Me, Coffee & Jesus

So girls, if your like me and you have big God-sized dreams and it doesn’t feel that you are chasing them fast enough, remember God has a plan and path of growth perfectly designed for you to walk.

 

If you’re over on the swings and life is feeling pretty up and down and you think the merry go round looks pretty sweet, I promise running in circles can look fun, but it is as hard as pumping your legs on those swings! How about we just promise to nod to one another and say a prayer for strength and endurance for where the other one is.

 

This week I challenge you to join me in taking a breath and savoring where you are right now. This spot in life has so much to soak in. And don’t forget to say a prayer for the girl across the playground. Even if it looks like she’s having fun and life is perfect, it’s never without its own rocks that end up in your sandal.

Us, Coffee & Jesus Link-Up

 

 

 Loading InLinkz ...

 

You can find me linking up at these awesome blogs!

God Sized Dream Follower

Have you ever had those moments in your life that are so God ordained there is no denying it as a God ordained moment. Maybe you don’t even recognize the full extent of His power and purpose over the moment for months or years after the moment happened.

I had a God ordained moment when I met a boy at age 16; a boy that God had planned to be my husband, a boy that saved me from the certainty of a lifestyle that I was headed for. A lifestyle that would have lead me down the path of college parties, drinking, premarital sex, and the host of negative outcomes that all of that brings-each one taking me further from the Truth and Love of Jesus. Everyday I recognize the blessing that Jesse is in my life, how through him God forever changed my path.

My other God ordained moment would be Him bringing my photography dream to life. I remember walking the isles of Best Buy praying “Lord, do I buy this camera, is it possible? Oh, is it possible that my dream could be on the brink of happening?” I bought the camera that day, I worked to create a successful business that I poured my heart and soul into. A business that I longed for. A business that taught me how to work hard, taught me the importance of prioritizing my work and to-do list and showed me what I risk losing when you don’t have the balance of family first, a business that taught me marketing, and other business skills. I also longed for my own studio, a space to display my artwork that I had created with the talents that God had provided. I longed for a place to welcome families, to cuddle newborns and create images of them that would last a lifetime. God blessed me with every aspect of this dream-even the end of it.

The time had come to say good bye to this dream, I was ready, yet sad it was over. I have celebrated the time it has created for me to pursue my family and for me to transition into another dream. A dream that has been alive longer then even owning my own business. The dream of ministry, to serve and help others grow in their relationships with Christ.

This  brings me to another God moment that began to happen before the business closed. A women’s ministry and youth ministry opportunity. These were both moments that seem to have been for such a short time that it would create the question: “What purpose where they for?” Especially since in the secret places of my heart, I view these as such failures on my part. I’ve begun to think about the time spent in these ministries and see that these dreams were short, yet the growing opportunities for me have been huge. They were opportunities of learning to work close with a team of people for the same goal, how to connect to people so they could learn to go deeper with Him, how to create excitement and passion for the Lord. Opportunities to practice having thicker skin, I’m still working of that lesson. You know the one, that not everything is personal and confrontation isn’t always bad. Please tell me someone else is struggling through that lesson!

These dreams that have come to an end have caused me to reflect on the purpose of our dreams and the work, prayer, tears and sweat that go into making them grow. Dreams that you have birthed, out of nothing into a living breathing something. I recently began to say to the Lord “WHY, why did I work so hard only to walk away?” He laid the answer on my spirit so powerfully that it took my breath away.

That He provided each of these dreams and allowed them to be lived out so HE could reveal to me that HE was in the business of dreams, in the business of making dreams happen. Taking God sized dreams and allowing us to be apart of them. 

See all of these questions come because I have a God sized dream that I’ve had since the summer of 2005. This dream began while at a women’s conference, at a time of my life that I was living selfishly and not focused on the Lord. But as that weekend happened and I watched the speaker, something within my very being whispered “I want that.” A dream that hasn’t diminished, only grown more with each passing year and with each step I take running after God. I have come under attack, viewing especially these God ordained ministry opportunities as failures, as examples of why would you want to pursue this dream because that will only fail too. Whispers that have tried to cover my dream, whispers from the enemy saying “you aren’t worthy, you have nothing to say, no one wants to hear from you.”

Well guess what, the enemy is right, I’m not worthy; but My God is. I have nothing to say; but My God does. No one wants to hear me; but they will want to hear from The Creator. 

God has blessed with me two friends that I’ve come to realize are rare gifts, and that the three of us together are exceptionally rare and will be powerful for the Lord. They too have similar dreams as mine. See, this dream is to be a christian women’s conference planner, public speaker and writer all for the glory of God. Wow, that was tougher to type then I thought it would be. There is something impactful about putting this down where all the world can now hold me accountable. I wouldn’t be surprised if you are reading this thinking that is pretty crazy! But that’s the thing about God dreams, He takes something the world says is crazy, heck even I said it was crazy. I’m the girl that was so shy that I hardly talked to my classmates in school, that hated public speaking, that didn’t go to the state music contest my senior year because too many people would be watching me. God’s response of this crazy dream is, through Me all things are possible, you were created for a purpose, I am with you through all things, I’ve transformed you into a new creation.

So the three of us together are dream followers not just dreamers. We have been given a vision, a God sized dream that we can’t contain anymore. A dream that might make us look crazy, but a dream that if we hold it within us any longer we may burst. A dream that we take one step at a time because the Lord has appointed us as moms and wives first. A dream that will be covered in prayer so won’t you join us in praying for it? A dream that will be directed by the dream provider and not ourselves.Joshua 1:9

I write this today to not only keep myself accountable because I’ve allowed myself over the years to become distracted from my true dream, thank goodness the Lord brings learning and growth through our rabbit trails. But I write this to other God sized dreamers, the future missionary, the future mom who adopts teenage boys, the future business owner, the future christian music artist, the future author. Listen to the whisper because there are lots of dreamers but few who are dream followers. Be brave, be courageous, be bold, because the Lord is in the business of God sized dreams and he is waiting for us to join Him.

What’s your God Sized Dream?

Look for me linked up at: www.simplifiedlife.net, www.w2wministries.org